Tuesday, November 15, 2011

Say Goodbye.

Saying goodbye was never one of my strengths.
I'm terrible at it.
I always say the wrong thing. 
Especially on Sunday.
I went to say goodbye to my best friend.
I knew what I was going to say.
Yet, not one single word of that came out.
It basically went like this, 
Thanks for everything.
Then we hugged.
Yeah, you too. 
Well...see ya..later?
Um..Yeah. See ya.

Then I got in the car and totally lost it.
I couldn't believe that is how I was planning on saying goodbye to my best friend.
But I left. 
And I couldn't sleep that night.
I didn't even say the word goodbye.
Just "see ya".
Something you say to your friend who is leaving your house but you are planning on seeing in like ten minutes.
Not someone leaving the country for two years.

But I didn't want to go see him again.
Because there is a reason I am no good at saying goodbye.
I don't like it.
I don't like the idea of someone leaving me.
Because like I said, you don't say goodbye to someone you plan on seeing soon.
You say it to someone you know you won't see in a long while.
And I don't want to think about not seeing my best friend for that long.
I didn't go back over on Sunday after I realized what a foolish farewell that was.
And I didn't go over Monday.
Then at work today, I realized, today was my last chance.
But I just couldn't go over.
So I decided to call him.
I knew exactly what I was going to say.
Thought it all out before I even dialed his number.
And the second he told me he was now officially a missionary, 
I forgot every word I had planned out.

But I said what I wanted to.
And I said goodbye.
Now he can leave.
I'll see him soon.

1 comment:

Nessie said...

Oh man. That sounds rough :( It seriously is the hardest thing to send off a missionary. Best of luck! It gets easier. And I'm only on week 3!