Thursday, September 29, 2011

To be, or not to be. It doesn't matter.

Living in a world where everyone tries to please everyone else, gets difficult. 
You say things over and over again because it's what they want to hear.
You say those things so much, that you can't even remember if they are what you really believe.
You feel like there is only one way to live and if you aren't following the footsteps of others, then you wont get support from anyone. 
The sentence,
"Oh, I'm actually not going to school right now."
becomes a conversation killer. 
You don't know what you want anymore.

Maybe this was the wrong decision.
What if I'm supposed to be doing that?
Should I be here?
What if I am missing out because I chose this instead?

I'm positive that I am not the only one who has had those thoughts.
But guess what.
It doesn't matter.
It doesn't matter what you chose.
School, 
work, 
living at home, 
moving out, 
where to go to school, 
what to study,
where to work,
etc.
It doesn't matter what you decide to do.
Because that is the thing.
YOU decide.
If it makes you happy, then do it.
No one else matters.
Forever I thought that there was a specific plan I needed to follow and if I didn't follow it perfectly, then my life just wouldn't go the way it should.
But that's not how it works.
YOU pick what you want to do.
YOU pick where you want to do it.
Then everything else falls into place.
It's okay to change your mind.
Your entire life doesn't need to be decided right this very second. 
In fact, even if you do plan it all out, it most likely wont go according to plan.
Things happen.
You change.
And nothing is wrong with that.
I would think something is wrong if you decided what you wanted when you were six and haven't changed your mind one bit since. 
Because you grow and learn new things, therefore changing the way you think. 
When you are introduced to more of the world, then you have more choices. 
Just choose what makes you happy.
It may take awhile to find out what that "thing" is. 
You may have to try 100 things to realize what you want to do with your life.
That's fine. 
It's your life.
Stop living it the way others want you to. 
Do exactly what you want. 
Be happy.

3 comments:

Shelbie Jude said...

love this.

and you're absolutely right.

laura... said...

so true! bless you, jenna abram. i'm so happy that you are doing what you want to do :)its an example to a lot of people.

Jessica said...

Love ya jen. I miss you so much!!!