Forever and Always.

She's sitting at the table, the hours get later
He was supposed to be here
She's sure he would have called
She waits a little longer, there's no one in the driveway
No one's said they seen him
Why, is something wrong?
She looks back to the window
Suddenly the phone rings
A voice says somethings happened
That she should come right now
Her mind goes to December
She thinks of when he asked her
He bent down on his knees first
And he said

I, I want you forever, forever and always
Through the good and the bad and the ugly
We'll grow old together
Forever and always

She pulls up to the entrance
She walks right to the front desk
They lead her down a million halls a maze that's never ending
They talk about what happened but she can barely hear them
She tries to keep a straight face as she walks into the room
She sits by his bedside, holds his hand too tight
They talk about the kids they're gonna have and the good life
The house on the hillside, where they would stay

Stay, there forever, forever and always
Through the good and the bad and the ugly
We'll grow old together, and always remember
Whether rich or for poor or for better
We'll still love each other, forever and always

Then she gets and idea and calls in the nurses
Brings up the chaplain and he says a couple versus
She borrows some rings from the couple next door
Everybody's laughing as the tears fall on the floor
She looks into his eyes, and she says

I, I want you forever, forever and always
Through the good and the bad and the ugly
We'll grow old together, and always remember
Whether happy or sad or whatever
We'll still love each other, forever and always
Forever and always, forever and always

She finishes the vows but his beeps are getting so low
His voice is almost too low
As he says, I love you forever, forever and always
Please just remember even if I'm not there
I'll always love you, forever and always 

Life.

Some people know EXACTLY how they want their life to play out.

Others?

Not a clue.

That's me.

I have changed my "plans" for my future at least one million times.

But it's fine.

Normal.

Completely ok.

Because guess what.

I think I know what I want to do.

Finally.

I finally feel like I am actually heading in the right direction.

Maybe I'll change it a few more times.

Maybe not.

All I know, is right now I feel satisfied.

And that is all I want.  

Ask, and ye shall receive. 

Accidental makeover.

It's fine.
I found a new background I wanted to put on here.
Somehow in the process I deleted the background I already had and it changed everything.
I don't know how to get it back,
and I'm not really in the mood to try.
So I guess this here is the new look..?
Hm. We'll see how long it lasts.

Patience is a virtue?

Do you ever get sick of just waiting?
Waiting for nothing.
At least that is what it seems like.
You wake up everyday with expectations. 
And almost none of them are met.
Mostly because you don't even know what the expectations are.
You just feel like something needs to happen.
But it never does.
Eventually, the waiting gets old.
And part of you wants to give up.
Even though you don't know what you are giving up on.


But maybe the waiting is worth it.
And maybe, the thing you wanted to give up on, 
will be great.
Sometimes you just have to go with it.
Even if it seems like all you are ever doing is "going with it".
When everything seems to be going bad,
Something good is just around the corner.
Waiting. 
If the good thing came when you were right in the middle of your hardest trials, you wouldn't even notice it. 
That is why things need to calm down a bit before you get something good.
So just wait it out. 
You'll be surprised with how great things get when you keep strong and carry on.
Patience is a virtue.

My carpet is soaking.

Sometimes your basement floods and you have to move out of your bedroom a lot faster than you planned.

But luckily the night before you decided to deep clean your room. 

It's kind of weird though. 

Seeing my room completely empty.

I spent hours putting pictures on the wall,

cutting out magazine letters for the door, 

pictures from magazines for the closet,

and just making it MY room. 

Then in less than half an hour, 

it looks like I was never even there.

I spent the majority of my time in there.

So it is kind of hard to grasp that I'm done with it being my room...

Well, now I just need to find a job so I can move out.

Clothes. Clothes. And more clothes.

I guess it could be considered somewhat of a problem when I get rid of all of this:

And my closets still look like this:

 I tried.

Apples.

"Girls are like apples on trees.

The best ones are at the top of the tree.
The boys don't want to reach for the good ones 

because they are afraid of falling and getting hurt.

Instead, they just get the rotten apples from the ground 

that aren't as good, but easy.

So the apples at the top think something is wrong with them, 

when in reality, they're amazing.
They just have to wait for the right boy to come along,

the one who's brave enough to climb all the way to the top of the tree."

So for all the girls out there that are worried they'll never get picked, don't worry. 

You just need to wait for the right boy to come along. 

One day he'll come and he will climb all the way to the very top to get you.

He may fall a couple of times, and get hurt.

He may even get tempted to give up and choose an apple from the ground.

An easy one. 

But eventually he will make it to the top and pick you.

Just be patient. 

Don't let yourself fall and become easy just to get a boy.

Because the boys who choose the easy apples, don't end up being all that great of boys in the end.

You deserve the very best. 

And he'll come. 

Ready to climb.

My train of thoughts...

Everyone has a dream man/woman. 
A person you spend your entire life building up.
You make checklists, qualities they must have, etc.
In our minds, they are perfect.
We compare everyone we meet to this imaginary perfect man. 
No one knowing for sure if he actually exists.
People keep falling in love with you, only they are not the people you want.
You can't figure out why the ones you fall for don't feel the same way.

Well guess what.
I've had a breakthrough.

In church yesterday the speaker said something that kind of hit me. 
It was something along the lines of,
"Stop thinking about the guy/girl of your dreams and start acting like the one from someone else's dreams. Then your dream person will come to you."
Who knew?
Probably the rest of the world. 
But I never really thought about it like that.
Once you start acting like a "dream girl", then your dream guy will come to you.
Crazy theory, huh?
So sitting around dreaming about your future husband won't do you any good unless you are working on being a dream wife. 
What makes you think you deserve  the best of someone else if you aren't your best self?


You may constantly be wondering why you are the one who is always having to chase, instead of being chased.
All you need to do is become chase-worthy.
Stop being a pessimist and just think postively.
Positivity attracts positivity.
AKA, once you start working on yourself to be the best and become truly happy with yourself, others will flock. 
You won't even have to try.
 It won't be easy at first.
Because when you aren't chasing someone it seems like there is no one.
Trust me, I know the feeling well.
But stop being a desperate, pathetic woman.
Just live your life.
And if you are living good, it'll happen when it happens.
Patience, patience, patience.
Something I as well need to work on.
But everything will work out in the end. 

Untitled.

 

ABRAM. Not Abrahm, Abrams, or Abraham.

The Abram family.

From left to right: Janelle, Jessica, Jeffery, Billy, Justine, Joanie, Jenna, Jolene, Jean (Mom), and Jeff (Dad).

I love these guys. 

Even the new addition.

Well, he's not quite part of the family yet..

But basically. 

It's a good thing I didn't name her yet.

Today my friend and I were running errands. 
We were on our way over to the bank which was just a right turn away, but he turned left instead.
Silly boy.
He said he wanted to go down Mainstreet.
Ok, whatever. That's fine. 
So we drive down Mainstreet and I see my oh so familiar car pulled off to the side of the road.
I tell him to pull over because I'm wondering what the heck my sister is up to. 
So we pull over and I see her sitting on the sidewalk. 
I get out and she runs up to me. 
Crying.
I look at the car. 
Crap.

  
She was driving and a car two cars in front of her stopped suddenly.
The car behind it, 
Which now looks like this:

Had to slam on its brakes, 
Which led Justine to have to slam on her brakes.
She didn't see the car stop fast enough and ended up slamming into the Student Driver in front of her. 
Which moved that car into the Prius. 
(The Prius only ended up with a tiny little dent in his bumper. Not even picture worthy.)
We were the "first ones on scene" and got there even before my parents.
All of a sudden we were surrounded by Firemen, Policemen, and the Ambulance. 
It was a pretty nasty wreck. 
Luckily Justine is only burned a little from the impact of the airbag and her wrist hurts a little.
Also luckily, she cleaned out the car like an hour before she got in the wreck.
We had a lot of junk in that car which would of been a pain to clean out for the tow truck.
Once again luckily, I'm glad Steve had the at the time not so bright but ended up being pretty bright idea of driving down Mainstreet. 
Interesting day to say the least. 
So. The un-named car that has been with us the past year is now deceased.
They say it is hard to say goodbye to something once you name it.
I guess it is a good thing I never got around to naming it.

Almost a summer activity..

We went camping last night.

In my bedroom.

It came, and it left.

Graduation. 
You spend your entire life for the moment where you flip your tassel to the other side of your cap. 
Every year you go to school, counting down the years until you get to walk in front of the "AF".
Before you know it, it's your senior year.
And it changed from counting down years, to counting down months.
Then weeks.
Then days.
Soon enough, hours.
Minutes.
And all of a sudden, you are standing behind the Student Body President waiting to walk onto the stage. 
The stage where you will sit and watch each and every member of your class walk across the floor and receive their diploma. 
Then your turn comes.
You stand with the others on the stage, and walk into the tunnel.
Your name is called.
And you shake the principal's hand. 
Then you go back to your seat. 
Everyone stands, and all together, you graduate. 
Then it's over.
And all thirteen years of public education comes to an end. 
Then you realize, all of the stupid things that mattered so much all those years, you can't even remember what they were now. 
You cry only when you see your best friends, and then you turn in your gown. 
And you get really happy when the coolest girl you've ever met hands you a lock of her hair.
A zillion pictures are taken and then you rush home to change for the party.
The all night party at Boondocks.
(Which may I add was possibly the greatest night of my life.)
You get home at 7:00 a.m. and it finally hits you.
High school is over.
And boy, it feels good. 
Then another thought hits you.
Summer.
Life is good.
And then you are out the next night until almost 2 a.m. with your best friend. 
But it's fine. 
Because you are graduated.